By Jeremy Meltingtallow

Bizarro is brought to you today by Alternative Lifestyles.

When I was a boy, I spent many hours with friends inhaling the helium from balloons and talking funny. Oh, the laughter. Then later I heard that this practice can actually be fatal. Anybody know if that’s true? I’m too lazy to look it up: one of the few things that Sarah Palin and I have in common.

We also used to play a version of Russian roulette. We didn’t have a gun, but one of my friends found a bullet, so we would put one bullet and five and foam rubber ear plugs into a bag, reach in and pull one out, then throw it as hard as we could at our own temple. No one was ever killed, but we occasionally got a small bruise. (This blog does not recommend this practice nor will it accept responsibility if you knock your own eye out.)

Where do jokes come from? Scientists have long studied what it is that makes people laugh and why. Nobody knows the definitive answer for certain, but it sure has made a lot of scientists giggle like school children.But then, the same can be said for nitrous oxide.

Here is another group of images from one of my sketchbooks. The loose theme of this one seems to be anthropomorphic methods of transportation. What it means is anyone’s guess.

You may find any number of Bizarro cartoons from the past decade on wonderful products that will heal your life, here.