August 1st, 2018
by Wayno & Piraro
(If it is embiggenation that you seek, click the nostrils of any character in the cartoon below.)
Bizarro is brought to you today by My Boots and Mexican Tile.
This post is late this week because Olive Oyl and I were in Guanajuato City over the weekend hanging out with the K2s (Krapuzar and Krelspeth) and their husbands (Ringworm and Fleshprod). We love that town and always have a damn dandy time. Can’t wait to go again. While visiting, I had a chance to get in a little busking to help pay for our meals.
Wayno was slaving away on future humor at Bizarro Studios North, of course. I only let him out once a year to get his teeth cleaned. Let’s see what he was up to…
I did some research to find out how many people’s opinions have been changed by a bumper sticker and the number was shockingly higher than I had anticipated: one.
Don’t miss Wayno’s blog this week because he shows the extended, horizontal strip version which has a couple more stickers. My personal favorite is “Boastful Claim About Offspring”. When my kids were little, I had a bumper sticker that said “Proud Parent of a Parolee For Good Behavior”.
My first wife played Bing Crosby’s White Christmas album so many times that, to this day, if I hear any of the songs from that album I go on a killing spree. It’s been a real holiday challenge to stay ahead of the authorities. One of my favorite things about Mexico is that you can leave the house during Xmas time without fear of being assaulted by tacky, homogenous decorations and music.
I think it’s high time we stop blaming victims in these situations, Prince Frog.
As for the princess, if you’re going to kiss amphibians or reptiles, I’d recommend choosing a gecko for the insurance benefits.
Kids: Be careful around lyres! This woman is an expert and has already lost two fingers.
These days, if you’re going to be a teacher in the U.S., be sure not to do it in a red state. They pay teachers less because they know where their voters come from. An uneducated electorate will fall for any horseshit FOX News and Facebook foreign operatives shovel at them.
Thanks for limping along with us this week, Jazz Pickles. If you’re enjoying the things we print and draw, please consider helping to support our efforts by clicking the links below. And if you don’t have all or any of the Official Bizarro Jazz Pickle Secret Symbol enamel pins, or an Official Bizarro Jazz Pickle T-shirt, point your clicker at our Bizarro Shop as fast as your finger will twitch!
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