My Cat Is A Perv
It’s not just that he stares at you while you pee.
It’s that I got a call from a neighbor a third of a mile down the street. They’d found his collar. Inside their kitchen. And he had knocked their dinner tray off the kitchen island.
So he breaks and enters, trashes the place, rips off his clothing, and leaves.
Did I mention he came with the name Tom? Apparently, that’s his last name. His first name is Peeping.