November 8th, 2013
by Wayno & Piraro
Bizarro is brought to you today by Funeral Fun!
The Invisible Man’s selfie is a zen joke. So little there, but so many philosophical interpretations. Does one truly exist if one is invisible? Was the Invisible Man naked when he took this or is it a closeup of just his face? What would God’s selfie look like? Would a smart phone be able to compensate for the blinding light of His omnipotence so you could actually make out the long, white beard and the vengeful, jealous look in his eyes? (Nahum 1:2-8) Now that I think of it, is the Invisible Man’s selfie in the same category as Anthony Weiner’s selfies? If so, I clandestinely managed to get porn into newspapers all over the world. (I’ve not posted the strip version of this because, guess what, it’s no different.)
If you don’t get this hilarious graphic, it is likely because you’ve not hear of “restless leg syndrome,” which is a real thing and I know this because I have it and hate it. Nobody knows exactly what causes it and the various treatments our friends in the pharmaceutical industry have concocted don’t work all that well. (But still cost a lot.) If you suffer from this, here’s the cure: marijuana. Smoke it or consume pot edibles and it completely eliminates the symptoms so you can get a good night’s sleep. I’m sorry if you live in an archaic part of the world where this completely natural and healthy medicinal herb is not legal. My advice is to move to another state or country, leave the troglodytes behind, and join the 21st century.
PAZZ JICKLES: On the topic of doctors, this senior Bizarro from 2009 is one of my personal favorites. I used to play “doctor” with the little girl next door when I was about 3 or 4 years old. I had no idea what we were doing and I’m sure she didn’t either, but we used to go behind some bushes in her backyard and show each other our plumbing. There was no touching, just a lot of giggling. Sometimes I wish adult romantic relationships were that simple and innocent.
Lastly, as per my agreement with the Movember people, here’s another pic of my mustache. This is a view almost NO ONE ever sees, the monster ‘stache before waxing it into its public form; the glory of it’s supreme Dali-ness.
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