Big Fat Scum Bear

By Jeremy Meltingtallow

bz panel 11-02-13bz strip 11-02-13Bizarro is brought to you today by The Most Inspirational Art You May Ever See.

I’ve been a bad Jazz Pickle in Chief lately. I forgot to post this cartoon from last Saturday and I’m already two days behind on this week’s. Things have been chaotic and very busy at Bizarro International Headquarters lately. Please accept my apology, I hope it has not negatively affected your Jazz Pickle experience.

So here’s a Bigfoot cartoon that ran a couple of days after Halloween, just when a person might be showing off their “Best Costume” trophy to friends. I’m a big believer in Bigfoot, just as I believe there are still tribes of primitive Homo sapiens, yet to be touched by modern civilization, living in the hills of Arkansas. Probably all over the Deep South, come to think of it. The scariest part is that they can vote.

bz panel 11-04-13bz strip 11-04-13Now that I have you thinking about elections, did you vote today? I didn’t either. Is Obama running again? Can I drive to Alaska and vote against Sarah Palin? What about Phillip Seymour Hoffman? Is he running? I like him. Am I up for anything? I love to win stuff!






Instead, let’s talk about liposuction. This peculiar field of medical science figures heavily into the plot of one of my favorite films, “Fight Club.” If you’ve not seen it, do that now, then come back and finish this blog. A warning to the squeamish: you won’t like it so maybe don’t bother.

In the strip version, I was able to include the ‘Stache Emporium,” which relates to the whole mustache-in-every-panel-for-the-month-of-November thing, and also a reappearance of Bunny’s Pie Repair, which was popular with you JPs the last time I featured it.

bz panel 11-05-13



And since this is election day in the U.S., my cartoon today is about the sort of hypocritical scumbag we so often have the choice of voting for. Like Will Rogers, I am reticent to trust anyone willing to do what it takes to get elected in modern-day America. I know it’s always been a problem, all over the world, since politics began, but since I’m alive now, I’m going to give in to the temptation to feel that it’s worse than ever!

This gag is the brain fruit of my known associate, Wayno of Pittsburgh. Check out his elucidating comments here.





PALEOZARRO: This is a cartoon from 1997 in which I fantasized that bears may have a class in which they learn to kill a human. Gee, that seems pretty dark when you write it out in words like that. bz 01-09-07 AntiCPR