Bizarro is brought to you today by Too Much Free Time.
I’m having a rough week, Jazz Pickles. There’s nothing you can do about it but since you (my reader) are my best friend, I just wanted to vent. Firstly, I received some bad financial news on my divorce that is STILL dragging on and on and is now likely to cost me many dollars more than it was going to yesterday. That’s never fun news. Secondly, (am I using “firstly” and “secondly” correctly? A little help, ProofNinja?) I spent a couple of days on a Sunday Bizarro for October that I really like but my editor tells me that I can’t use it as is for fear of lawsuits. The whole cartoon is about PetSmart, the pet store chain here in the U.S., and even though I thought I’d be protected under satire laws, apparently I’m not so I had to change it to another store name. It dampens the joke but doesn’t ruin it, so I’ll just have to live with that. Such is the action-packed, edge-of-danger life of a syndicated cartoonist, but it’s still a bummer. I’ll post both version here when the time comes.
Thanks for listening to me bitch. I feel better.
BIZARROLD: This frog/fly cartoon from 2004 reminds me of a story. Though I’ve never kissed a woman with a fly on her lip, I kissed a girl at a party when I was 19 years-old and she abruptly turned around and puked all over the ground. She was drunk, yes, so I should be grateful that she had the presence of mind to release and turn around before projecting. The next day I called her for a date and she eventually ended up being my first wife and the mother of my daughters, Krapuzar and Krelspeth. (For whom the “K2” in my cartoons stands.) Let this be a lesson to you younger readers. I’m not sure what the lesson is, but it seems there should be one in there somewhere.