Fighting Founders

By Jeremy Meltingtallow

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Lincoln had a big year, not the least of which was the Academy Award winning film directed by what’s-his-name, starring that really good actor. A Lincoln film you might have missed, however, is one I happened to see the other night on that big, black, flat, rectanglular deal on the wall of my living room. It is called something like “Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter.” It had good and bad things in it.

Good: I learned a new “rule” to the whole vampire thing and that is that vampires can’t kill each other. Who knew? Bad: Lincoln didn’t even have a beard through most of the movie so you could hardly recognize him. PLUS…the actress who played Mary Todd was attractive, which is, according to the pictures I’ve seen, historically inaccurate. When I’m watching a historical film of this nature, I immediately think, If that was inaccurate, what else about this film is inaccurate? Can I trust any of it?  If I were school age, I would definitely seek some other source before I wrote an essay on Lincoln.

Next year will be better for Washington as a film about his life is scheduled to be released in the summer of 2014. I’m hoping it pays more attention to historical accuracy.