May 3rd, 2013

Missing Fruit(s)

by Wayno & Piraro

Bizarro is brought to you today by Sexy Time!

I personally know someone here in the United States of America who didn’t get this gag at first. So that leads me to believe that people in other countries may not, either. So here goes another explanation of a joke, which you’re never supposed to do. But I like to live dangerously so I’m going for it. Without a helmet or seat belt, I might add.

“Grow a pair” is a fairly common expression spoken to a man when he  is not acting like manly. The assumption is that a “pair” of something is what makes you act manly: aggressive, foolhardy, judgmental, macho, butch, tough––all of the things we hate in others. No one ever says a pair of what, so one is left to make one’s own assumption.

On the outside, the head, neck, nose, mouth, navel, rectum, and penis are the only things there are not a pair of. On the inside, the list is a little longer: heart, liver, pancreas, intestines, spine, sternum, stomach, appendix, and other gooey things like that. Everything not on one of those lists is a candidate. Choose wisely before you decide to grow some.