Dumpster Art

By Jeremy Meltingtallow

Bizarro 04-28-13 WEB


(For a fuller, more luxuriant experience with this cartoon, click the guard’s sock.)

Bizarro is brought to you today by Bizarro Boulevard.

Here’s a fun cartoon that takes a few seconds to put together in your mind, which is my favorite kind. To fully get it, you may need to have used one of those recorded guided tours at a museum, but I’ll wait while you go do that. Now that you’re back, don’t you think this is funny?


1. Bob Abrahams is a real person, though he does not work as a museum guard. He’s actually a retired guy in my neighborhood in LA whom I’ve made friends with. We first met when I spotted him eating cupcakes out of a dumpster behind a bakery. I asked if he was homeless and he said he was not, he just really likes 3-day-old cupcakes and the bakery always threw them out before that. Bob reads this blog every day (even when there is no new content, sadly) and comments frequently here and on my official Bizarro Facebook page. He’s a swell guy.

2. In the middle background is a cameo by me and my Special Lady Friend, Klamelda; I’m the dandy in the hat, she’s the statuesque blonde at my right. We’ve been dating for over a year now, so I figured it was safe to drop her into a cartoon. (Any time before that would have represented too much commitment on my part.) She and I first met when she found me digging through a dumpster in back of a strip club which she happened to be passing by. (It was NOT her place of employment.) She asked me if I was homeless and I said that I was not but that I’d been to this club the night before and misplaced my self respect––I was hoping perhaps it had been accidentally thrown in the trash. She immediately dove in, ostensibly to help me regain it. Over the course of the next hour-and-a-half in that dumpster, we did not find my self respect (in fact, she lost hers, as well) but we’ve been together ever since.

3. There are 9 secret symbols in this cartoon but I can only find 7 of them at the moment. How did you do? Here’s a complete list of the possibilities, except for the firecracker, which I never got around to adding to the page.