My eyes!!

By Jeremy Meltingtallow

Well, it finally happened. Granted, it happened about 5 months ago, so in this household it’s long lost history. And I can even laugh about it. What the heck am I talking about, you ask? The event that spawned this comic strip:

I’m already known for pushing the envelope in the bedroom department (in comic strip land, people), but apparently, this strip got the online community talking. I’m so past it in my own mind, it took me by total surprise. Therefore, I thought I’d relive the past and recall that —ahem— fateful morning that started it all. Sorry, sickos, no graphic details.

Yes, it was morning. On a weekend. My husband and I were enjoying some…intimacy.  Anyhoo, we suddenly heard the door creak open. We froze. The one day we forgot to lock the door, our younger daughter decided to come in. Unlike Jess in the strip, I don’t think she knew what was going on. My husband panicked and asked (in a very unnaturally high voice) for her to leave and close the door.

My first reaction? Shock, embarrassment. My second reaction? How will this affect my daughter. Third reaction (okay, actually it was a tie with the second)? This would make a funny comic strip. Now I guess I”m the sicko.

So how did we deal? I stayed upstairs and hid for a while. My husband went downstairs and nonchalantly told our daughter she caught him “giving mom a hug.” When I recall that, I’m grateful we were in the right position for that explanation. (Ohhh, yes, I said that!)

As for the strip idea,I didn’t turn it into a big story line. It just is what it is: a mortifying event that Jill and Rob would like to put behind them. Tomorrow’s strip is the wrap-up and that’s it. The past is the past.

Unless you’re a cartoonist, your daughter reads the strip when it’s published, and then puts two and two together. Um…I think I’ll go hide the paper.