Food Funny

By Jeremy Meltingtallow

(To see this cartoon larger and in most of its glory, click the wiener.)

Bizarro is brought to you today by Human Ingenuity.

If I may be momentarily immodest, allow me to say that I really love this cartoon. Everything from the layout and drawings to the deadpan silliness just thrills me. My decades-long admiration for B. Kliban really shows here.

If you saw last Sunday’s cartoon post on this blog, you will remember that my goofy buddy from Somewhere, Texas suggested the germ for it. Oddly enough, good old Brian Levy suggested this one, too. Someone must have sprayed his laundry with genius juice that week. His original suggestion here was “what if other food products had their own car, like the Oscar Mayer Wienermobile?” I decided to make it other countries instead, took the ball and ran with it.

As a vegan, I wouldn’t eat an Oscar Mayer product if you put a gun to my head, of course, but that’s never stopped me from digging the Wienermobile. I’ve seen it on the roads in person quite a few times in my life and I always get a thrill. It’s just so effing weird! Other weird cars I like are:

Monkees Mobile

Batmobile from the 60s

Munster Coach

Does anybody make campy-cool cars like these anymore?  There’s this fun little guy, but it’s a sequel so it loses some of its punch.

AUTHOR’S NOTE: Even though hotdogs can be delicious, I gave them up long before I became vegan. When I was still a corpse muncher, I gave up processed “meat” products like hot dogs, sausages, baloney, spam, etc. because––in my not entirely uneducated opinion––they are pretty much on the very bottom rung of the ladder of acceptable objects to put into your body. I think the only thing less wise would be to slurp up the slimy, pink goo they are made of right off of the shovel they use to scrape them up off the slaughterhouse floor.