Stones Nuts Bully Spray

By Jeremy Meltingtallow

Bizarro is brought to you today by Hat Preparedness.

Hey, Jazz Pickles, I have some fun news. I’m going to start a new blog (in addition to this one) called, “Bizarro Comics Adult.” On it, I will post adult cartoons, stories, opinions and thoughts like my promised review of the sex toy trade show that I went to earlier this week. Whatever content that is not considered by the Fox News Family to be “family friendly” will post to that site instead. I expect to have my toy show review up by this time tomorrow and I hope you’ll enjoy it.

Meanwhile, let’s get you caught up on the Bizarro cartoons that have published this week so far. If you’re old enough to remember the Stones when they were young, this first cartoon might appeal to you. I got a giggle when I wrote it. If you’re a youngster and have always thought that The Rolling Stones are a government program for musically-inclined senior citizens, perhaps this gag will inspire you to look into their roots.

This cartoon about nuts is not dirty enough to end up on Bizarro Comics Adult but it’s still pretty suggestive. I expect a “cease and desist” letter from Bill O’Reilly any day now. At least I can hope.

My cyber bully cartoon is a collaboration with my “known associate,” Wayno. He writes about it here. Read it, then come back. We’ll wait.

Welcome back. Wasn’t that fascinating? I thought you’d like it. Can I get you anything before we continue? A beer? A glass of water? A chair that is not covered with rabid badgers? No? Then let’s get back to it.

My last entry today is about salt and pepper. I have naturally low blood pressure and a healthy diet, so salt isn’t a problem for me and THANK GOD! Because I like it and don’t want to have to give up anything else I like. I’m still having withdrawal symptoms from giving up high school cheerleaders, and that was thirty years ago.

I must toddle off and feed the Ever-Charging Deadline Rhino now. Be well, Jazz Pickles.

Where’s the books? Here.

Where’s the goods? Here.

Where’s the new, filthy, adults-only, no one under 18 admitted blog? Here.

(Don’t tell Bill O’Reilly!)