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Sunday Punnies #20

By Jeremy Meltingtallow

(To see this cartoon as big as Texas, click the pig’s belly.)

Bizarro is brought to you today by Bearded Children.

My Sunday Punnies series appears every six weeks-or-so and features puns donated by readers for which I have devised (presumably) funny pictures. If you have an original pun that you think might make a good Bizarro vignette and you’d like to see your name in the newspaper (who wouldn’t?), this is your big chance! All you need do is follow the simple guidelines and tips below.

SUBMISSION GUIDELINES & TIPS:

1. Just go to the comments section of this post and type your pun idea into the space provided. By doing so, you warrant that the pun is your own original fabrication, as far as you know, and that you expect no compensation or copyright for what I come up with based on your suggestion. (TIP: Use your fingers to type with and not a large, heavy, blunt object.)

2. Include in your comment the name you’d like me to use as credit at the bottom of the frame, should I choose to illustrate your idea. You may be as literal or cryptic with your name as you like. (TIP: Using the name of a wanted criminal is not recommended unless you enjoy surprise visitors from various law enforcement agencies awakening you from slumber in the middle of the night.)

3. Do not expect to see your submission show up in the comments section. I do not publish pun suggestions to keep from ruining the fun for other readers if I should use it or embarrass you with public rejection if I don’t. (TIP: Do not stand in the middle of a busy street holding up a sign that says, “Go around me, jackass!”)

That’s all there is to it. It’s fun, it’s easy, and there is no pressure that you may miss out on some fabulous prize should I pick your pun out of the legions that are sent it, because I don’t give prizes! What’s not to like?

Let us now forge ahead to the two cartoons I published at the end of this past week. The first presents a mysterious question: Moses carried tablets, some cold remedies come in tablet form, and devices like the iPad are also called a “tablets”––coincidence? Probably not. I suspect this seemingly strange phenomenon is due to the fact that in English, anything of a certain shape is called a “tablet”. Such is the disappointing nature of language.

Our final selection today is a fun little gag that I did both for those readers who enjoy world play and those who enjoy fantasizing about the Kardashians crashing into an immovable object. (Which is likely just about all of us.) And, yes, of course Bruce Jenner would be among them in this hypothetical vehicle of fate.

YOU: Dan, where can I get your new book? ME: Lots of places. Here’s one now.

YOU: Can I find hundreds of your cartoons on so, so many various products at affordable prices? ME: You can if you click this. Yes.