Doctor Online Alien Soup

By Jeremy Meltingtallow

Bizarro is brought to you today by Foot Fetish.

I’ve been busier than a long-tailed cat in a roomful of rocking chairs this week, so I’m late on posting these. I hope I haven’t lost either of my readers.

Cartoon #1 is a visual joke, nothing more. Take it however you like. The patient is fashioned after my good friend, Tiny Tony T. Smith, who recorded my someday-to-be-released album recently. Eventually, I’m going to sell a CD of four or five of my original songs. They’re all serious songs, not meant to be comedy, but the lyrics are clever (or so I’ve heard) and people often get a chuckle or two from them. Would any of you be interested in buying said album and if so, how much should it cost? Maybe I can figure a way to download them for 99 cents a piece like they do on iTunes instead of creating 3-D discs. I don’t know anything about that stuff.

I hear they have online games where you build a virtual farm or city or something like that. From that scant knowledge, I wrote this cartoon. I hope it makes sense to someone. One reader from Pittsburgh thought I was making fun of his town and asked me what I had against Pburgh. I responded that I had nothing against it, I actually really like that town and have a few friends there that I enjoy visiting. He wrote back that he’d a few too many beers when he typed the email. There’s a lot of good beer in PB, so I can understand that.

I really like cartoon #3. For some folks, it might take a minute or two to make the connection between “steroids” and “asteroids,” but that’s okay. We’ll wait for you. This gag was dreamed up by my good friend, Cliff Harris, who has a way with wordplay that I think is unique. He thinks of things that would never occur to me. He has some really good ones coming up in the next month or so, keep your eyes peeled.

I should also say that I’m happy with the art on this one. Most cartoonists just never get tired of dreaming up aliens and monsters. Along those lines, here is one of Cliff’s cartoons from long ago that I did for Parade Magazine. It’s a bit of a mind-twister, but gratifying when you get the gag. Cliff is one clever dude and also just about the sweetest person I know.

Cartoon #4 is from my “known associate,” Wayno. He is one of the friends who lives in Pburgh that I mentioned above. I thought this was a fun new take on the classic waiter-there’s-a-fly-in-my-soup cartoon genre. He’s probably got tons of blabber about this collaboration on his own blog (along with two earlier pencil versions he submitted to me), which can be seen by your eyes if you apply some sort of electronic impulse to this link.


This concludes today’s entry. You may return to viewing porn, or better yet, go here and buy some Bizarro cartoons on swell products.